Fear Failed

Who knows what will happen but today...today I am free from the worry of what tomorrow might be or look like or even feel like. I am writing today because it is my way to escape when the weather is blistering cold and I can't get out among the trees, the water, and the breathe life that God has so graciously allowed me to have daily. Whom am I and what is my family that you have brought me this far... 2 Samuel 7:18. I'm honestly in awe of the deliverance in so many areas, but today I am free...free of fear. I'm not saying it will never come again, shoot that wouldn't be reality but in this moment there is peace. Honestly a bit of excitement instead of anxiety is building as I'm facing one of the biggest fears ever in my life directly in it's face. I am stepping out into something one professional told me I couldn't.

There have been many opportunities to do this very thing, but the fear was as if chains after chains with wenches were holding me back. It was fake....it was when I was young, impressionable, and naive that the words "you can't do that" stuck. Then many other relationships, words, and journeys in my life piled on top of that confirmation of  "you can't...you're a failure so don't risk it". I've even recently been given the words from a dear Christian friend whom thought they were being supportive add to this failure thoughts by stating I wasn't trusting God. Fail! The enemy will get your focus off your designed purpose however he can. I was given a what I call a natural gift, and I am now going to step out of fear into "in spite of it". I do mean when I say "I" only by God can I do anything. God gets all the glory.

There's a book to be written behind these 10 fingers just in this one story alone. And no, not right now, I'm not saying what I'm doing...just know that I really went from paralysis into letting my Creator carry me through. His Will will get done no-matter what we fear. :) So for the last several weeks these are just some of the spontaneous things, words, requests, texts, and pictures that have come across my lap personally to confirm my direction is now: step out and change fear to faith with freedom...

I also then received a video link sent to my email...

I'm not listening either :)

So, I realized I'm a dreamer...and my fears came from thinking about failing what could be the end result. But see, I have to stop. Be still in the moment to find what today has for me. I've wasted many days worrying about a tomorrow that isn't promised to me. If I try today, and die tomorrow then I have succeeded because failure wasn't in the "trying it"...failure would be in doing nothing.

Circus animals are trained from the time of infants by chains holding onto their legs. This gives them a boundary in which they come to realize they cannot pass over. So when the elephant then becomes big...it doesn't know that the trainers have unlatched it from the anchor, so this large animal still thinks its being held back and doesn't even try to go past it's boundary. Even though, this monstrous powerhouse could have pulled it's weight and won against such an anchor for a very long time...it's perception and mind has been tricked into thinking it couldn't. Well, I'm a monstrous powerhouse that God has freed for His Glory. I thought I was still stuck, chained, and locked away from being what was already naturally mine to share.

Can't wait to share my destiny. If you're in my personal life then you're part of the story too...how fun!