Friday, December 30, 2011

What a Year 2011 has been...

Jan: Lost in the world of emotional attachment & loving all the weight I had lost at this point from the surgery.

Feb: Started a tug-a-war work with God, but of course He won. Joined a bible study by John Ortberg. Took Koda to see Dr. Gutmann for the first time in St. Louis @ NF Clinic. Hubby gettin better with age :) Missing my mom; it was 6 years since a car wreck tragically took her life. :(

March: Wow, made some complete decisions to Quit living the lie & searched the Truth: joined a group.     Transitioned Koda from home school to John Fiske Elementary. Time to focus on me a bit. Walking!!!

April: Learned what a boundary was & then started placing them on purpose :) Healthy relationships grew! Joined a new church that feeds my soul.

May: My oldest daughter graduated, making me feel pretty dang old; and my baby boy turned 6.

June: Well I hated coming into my thirties; but now I'm starting on that journey out as I turned 38. White hairs! Do a Beth Moore Bible Study w/ CCC. Celebrated 8 years of marriage.

July: Summer is here, my youngest daughter finally gets a car; no longer taxi :D I start getting lazy. Became a Thirty-One Consultant...gotta love bags! Happy 82nd birthday to Grandma Lola & 60th to Uncle Basil.

August: School starts; routines begin; homework, IEP's and a chaotic mess when it comes to meds; Focus on Koda full force now. Holly is a Senior!! Another graduation coming up. Happy 19th birthday to Halie.

September: Struggled with meds, Forget about self trying to figure out how to best help Koda. Ricky & I join a marriage group; Yay...love our group!! Happy 18th birthday to Holly.

October: Koda fails hearing/vision test at school, Koda gets glasses for astigmatism, abnormal optics send us back for MRI.

November: Koda's plexiform neurofibroma has grown, Koda has a new brain tumor. Devastated for a moment! I have all the kids for Thanksgiving. Watch plaza lighting with kids. Missing my mother-in-law; it has been one year since she decided she wanted to go home.

December: Holly ACT scores 27 :D, ADHD meds finally get settled, 3 denials for chemo coverage; then approved on Christmas Eve. Koda starts chemo (Gleevac). Holly goes to visit her dad & family. We spent Christmas with Mrs. Hottie Patoddie (Aunt Marilyn) & Family. Halie brings Holly home & we celebrate Christmas again on New Years Eve :D.

A special thank you to all of you that have been personally involved in our life this year. Thank you for caring enough to step out of your own lives unselfishly to bless ours. Your outpouring of time, talent, finances, and hearts have forever impacted ours. We love you!! Because of you...


I'm simply Lola; Living Out Loud Authentically by Leaning On Lord Almighty.


The healing has begun...


Blessings & Happy New Year,
Lola Yvonne

Saturday, November 12, 2011

A new tumor (brain glioma)...

and growth of the plexiform neurofibroma sends us down a new journey of chemo. Koda's update. Please sign his guestbook.

Monday, November 7, 2011

Ohh Pitiful me...

is what I use to say as I have looked homelessness in the face, I have been in a place of my life when I didn't have a bed, I have known a lot of people and never had a "friend", I have been in the pits of darkness, loss, and despair. I have been by the bedside of my loved ones whom took their last breath, I have been forced to do things I would have never chose on my own, I had to grow up fatherless, I have children with medical/health/development/behavioral issues, I have lost my mother at a young age, I have been through a divorce, I have done and seen way more than I would ever ask anyone to even image. But because of these things; I can say "I understand" when there is another one in that place, I can comfort with words of experience, I can encourage when there is no hope, I can just listen when they need to tell someone, I can embrace when they need to cry. There's healing in relationships of being known. I've healed because God has so gracely placed such people in my life. For this I am so eternally grateful.



...for the little things, but some of the most important things; a roof, a bed, blankets, and the things money can't buy; like true friendship when you need a bed...they bring you one. I've got to experience that a lot lately. More than I want really but am so thankful. Through people being the hands and feet of Jesus I have a desire to know Him better. It's because of Him that we have anything good. I have gifted, energetic, creative, and amazing children, I have a simple home with all the love in the world, I have Jesus in my heart, and I have a husband who loves me, provides to the uttermost, and just plain likes me. I have a Heavenly Father, I'm no longer in a pit of despair, I have a mother awaiting me in Heaven, I chose to do things now that make a difference in the world, I see things in a different view, I walk hand to heart with people into the unimaginable, I help deliver backpacks of food for children in need, I have a lot of friends, I can sit and be quiet when I really want to shout, I can help comfort the dying to a place they really want to go, I see the light daily, and I'm thankful that He has made it so clear through the windows of our eyes if we'll just open them and take off the glasses of lies. We are without excuse the Bible tells us...

"For since the creation of the world God’s invisible qualities—his eternal power and divine nature—have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that men are without excuse."
Romans 1:19-21
 
Thankful...for my vision, health, limbs, ability to move, speak, hear, and most of all live in the freedom to express my love for Jesus; and all He has done for me! Are you thankful?

Monday, September 12, 2011

Life doesn't stop...

...even though it seems like it should at least for a little while, right? Especially when we have just been hit with another or maybe just the first "diagnosis, lay-off, let go, you're pregnant, just got engaged, got a job, a birth, now homeless, a graduation, promotion, or death is knocking". Just for a moment don't we want just one person to stop for a moment; embrace us & let us know that we're known. We just want someone to acknowledge we exist, our words matter, and we are loved by someone.

Do you see/hear the pain or the excitement in that co-worker, neighbor, spouse, homeless on the corner, family member, friend or acquaintance; or are we all just a little too busy with what's going on with us? I had a YIPPEE, Praise the Lord moment today because I have a family member with an incurable cancer & she got good news today. No, it wasn't that a cure had been found, but that this cancer has not reduced her living. I appreciated that phone call; first that she took the time just to call me right out of the doctor's visit, and second that she felt able to share. I have known times in my life when there wasn't anyone to share my celebrations or sadness with. Thank God that I know that there is a purpose to my life outside of myself.

The struggles of everyday life sometimes gets us so caught up that the days fly by, and I ask, "where did last month go"? Another friend of mine took the time to share a quote with me, thank you friend! The quote is: "I can be changed by what happens to me, but I refuse to be reduced by it." Maya Angelou Ohhh believe me, not in my own power did I agree with this quote, but by the Grace of God! Life has thrown me a few struggles that many have no clue, and will never know unless walked in my shoes. God forbid! I use to think, if anyone ever knew the "real me"...I would never be accepted or loved. I was wrong! The relationships that have recently came to be in my life are the healthiest of friendships, support, and love that I have ever seen. I have also found that the toughest of friendships have been the best teacher yet.


May you have some grace & be humbled enough to take the time to listen, so when someone else' life stops for a moment you may be the only listening ear, caring hand, loving hug. Life doesn't stop, so lets' all not take advantage of the life we've been given. 

Thursday, September 8, 2011

It's been awhile...

...since I've blogged. I've kept it all up on paper though because I'd go crazy if I didn't write. We've been through some stuff lately, and I'll share some here. Updates on everyone that is. I want to thank everyone with the encouraging words to get back to blogging. I really felt moved that my words have made a difference in my readers lives.

1. Ms. Halie as she is still living with Joey in Arkansas, and working at KFC. I miss her greatly, the last time I seen her was in May at her HS graduation.

2. Ms. Holly well the big 18th birthday is coming up on the 17th, and well it's her Senior year in HS, but is in college classes more than HS classes. No complaints here, she has a big load this year with working a part-time job too. Her & Wyatt "Bongo" are still dating, it's been over a year now.

3. Mr. Rick has changed over to driving a commercial route instead of being the mechanic of those big trucks. He was losing hours doing the other, and with him being the "Bacon" so I can have a flexible schedule to take care of the medical needs around here.

4. Mr. Koda has started the 1st grade. I'm so glad we started the transition into public school last year with all his issues; because I know we would be a long way from him getting the services needed for a successful school year had we not. We are about to have an IEP meeting soon, we actually may have to drop the IEP & be an OHI instead; but all is well as long as services are provided. For those of you who don't know those terms (IEP...Individualized Education Plan) (OHI ...Other Health Impairments). These terms are labeled on kids with specialized education settings, services, etc. such as Occupational Therapy, Speech, Physical Therapy, Paraprofessional help, etc. The year has started very well so far, and I look forward to working with the team.

Koda recently has been to the ophthalmologist & ENT the last two weeks. Koda is now wearing glasses due to a strong astigmatism. In that check up they found abnormal optic nerves and orbits...so here we go again MRI. The story of Koda's life will be these MRI's to confirm tumors and their growth. They want to rule out there being a optic glioma which is a common type of tumor in those living with NF. This MRI which will be of the brain, optics, and neck so they can check the tumor in which he already has for growth. We're looking at that the first week of Nov. The ENT visit was fun for Koda as the doc tickled his ear to get the tube that was just hanging by wax out. He lost the other tube within the last year. Koda failed his hearing test so if the fluids don't clear up by 7 weeks of breathing treatments for the ears, and medication he will be having surgery again to replace the ear tubes. This will be scheduled around the end of the year.

5. Last but not least, me, I'm working on Me! I have taken since February this year & devoted myself to finding out what God has planned for me, and the steps to fulfill that. You will see more about that in blogs to come, especially now that the kids are back in school. :) This weather rocks!!